argh! i can't resist the temptation to blog! happened to peek at the pc while on the way back to my room.. hiak hiak hiak.. the seat's empty!! haha. the reason being, my dad's taken a whole week off from work(great, just when my exams are packed into this whole week), and my bro's enjoying his school holidays right now.. argh. that equals to both of them taking turns to HOG the com.. -_-

yays, i gotta make my online time worthwhile then! but what else can i talk about besides exams? and mugging? hm, supposed to be biah-ing my econs mcq right now, but heck. oh btw, had a wonderful lunch with dith after math paper2 today! whee.. there was lots of food.. palatable except for the super-crunchy-more-like-rock-hard-rather bread sticks.. and lots of conversation! fyi, we were at pizza hut, enjoying the cheap lunch express set, but not so for the atmosphere.. quiet (empty), hawker-centre-like except for the aircon, and chinese auntie waitress.. GEE. dith and i were like ordering our food in chinese. weird thing to do at a place like pizza hut? that's ok, cos all the talking made up for the lack of ambience.. heh. i haven't had such a long chat with someone for a very long time! thanx dith for the company! *muacks* i'm actually a very chatty person, just that somehow during the transition into jc, i 've quietened a little.. i remember hogging the phone during sec school days.. haha. or maybe it's just dith that makes me feel like talking! :)

btw! did i say i got the lame genes from my parents? just yesterday, my dad was looking for his glasses. he was asking mom, guess what she said?! (there was newsweek lying on the nearby table with mahathir in specs on the cover) "theeere! your glasses are with mahathir!"... *rolls on floor laughing* geez, come to think of it, mahathir's glasses do look like my dad's.. hahaha. so LAME! seriously, there couldn't have been a better answer than that!

hai, 3 days into A's.. 8 more days till it's over! way to go.. but dreading human geog.. eeeee.

ok, back to econs! (and Holland V later! tonight's episode's is a must-watch!)

time for my once-in-a-blue-moon shoutout!!
Happy Belated Halloween everyone! haha.. as if we celebrated it..
hm, i'm wondering why i'm still feeling so energetic.. while most people are blue, and super stressed? *touches own forehead* i think i have a 100degrees fever..

well, i was trying very hard to get some econs into my head yesterday, when i suddenly had this thought of stacking all my notes away and sending them to Antarctica.. or any deserted island in the world.. i dunno why, but i just felt i wasn't a book-ish person at all.. all this while i've been numbed by tons of books, lectures and tutorials.. none of which i'd been interested in. if my parents chucked me at a bakery and made me work there i'd gladly do it! it's really just not me to be buried in books all the time.. yea, true that i managed to survive primary and secondary school, but the purpose was not for myself.. all i wanted was to please my parents.. however, i cantback out now, not when i'm already near the end..

Holy Waterrrrrrr... i need holy water! to calm my nerves! the concealed anxiety i have inside of me which refuses to fade off, which shall choose to erupt on the very day of my exams!!! i suppose this is an after-effect of going to Novena with Jason and Na, especially when my bottle of holy water has been exhausted.. need.. to.. go.. this.. saaaat...

on a happier note! my flights to and from Rome has been confirmed!!! yipeee!!! we'll be leaving s'pore on 14th dec at 8.55pm.. and returning on 24th dec (christmas eve!) morning 11.15am!! whee!! i've never been so excited i tell you.. i think it's prolly enough to offset my anxiety for A's? anyone gonna miss me? haha.. prolly all partying while i'm gone.. gone to see (i hope) THE POPE!! how's that mannnn!!! another good news is, we have to transfer flights at bangkok! wow! know what that means? SHOPPING! haha.. fatal addiction.. *rubs hands* i hope 14th dec comes real soon!

furthermore! i'll be going for David Tao's concert on 7th dec!! that's like double blisssss.... i can imagine myself at the indoor stadium already! aaahhhh! *grabs mimi and screams* we're going! we're really going! ^_^ hm, weird that the ad for his concert only came out recently.. mimi's dad had booked our tix quite long ago, and sad to say, we're quite the slowcoaches.. most of the good seats have been taken already..

i guess i should be rejoicing.. there's just so much to look forward to after the A's! not to mention clubbing as well.. heh. first party of the month shall be on 21st nov at chinablack, proceeds are supposedly going to go to some vietnamese children fund.. my friends suspect it's a scam, but what the heck? i'm there to enjoy myself anyway.. :P

*skipping around the room* i must work.. last week to mug! hm, word of the week? consistency! including fervent prayers! i musnt let my parents down..

i'm so sorry for the error display of photos! but i think i'll only try to put them up after A's.. no time to get them up now.. but yea, like everyone's so excited and looking forward to A's.. including me! ain't we?? so that after A's we can go CLUBBING!!! hahahaha.. :P

clubbing and me... i'm definitely going crazy.. crazy from.. not studying enough.. crazy from.. sleeping too much.. arghhhh. u know what i mean, i know i have to help myself but my limbs and my brain just won't listen to me! *screams at brain, then at limbs* my fingers are only good at typing on my blog, not for grabbing a pen and scribbling pages and pages of essay outlines, data reps, math sums and gp compres.. hmph. useless limbs i say. do your work i say!

away from my useless limbs.. i think my mom's experiencing MENOPAUSE.
i told her that all women will experience menopause at one point in their life and you know what? she screamed at me! atrocious behaviour! i was being nice and all, trying to tell her that menopause does not equal end of the world and that it isn't all that bad, and that one day i'll be experiencing menopause too (not that i don't right now) at some point of my life.. blah the blah the blah.. and she told me to shut up and forbid me to say the word MENOPAUSE. wtf? then i gave up and yelled at her for being childish.. it's no use telling her nicely.. she only listens when i yell.. sucks. therefore, if i cant say it in front of her face, i say it here.. menopause, menopause, menopause, menopause, menopause!!!!! super annoying mom i tell you..

oh, and more annoying stuff. ok, maybe not that annoying, but ya. this is definitely not the first time this is happening to me. i hang out with a friend, gotta face her extreme mood swings and get insulted (because she didn't bother about my feelings). i mean, what's wrong? you gave an unpleasant comment, fine i take it. later on, you start sulking and that makes me wonder if i'm that bad a person to hang out with. you were fine one moment and totally @!$%&^@!# the other.. i really cant keep up with your mood swings. i'm always glad to hang out with you but if you're sick of going out with me just tell me, i'll accept that. don't leave me hanging there wondering if the reason was me or pms please, thankyou very much.

hm that felt better. the blog is always a good place to just bleurgh out all that bad stuff bottled up inside..

btw! i miraculously did a gp compre today! whee! congratulate me cos i'm a frequent gp ponner and i hardly hand in work.. blargh. and i ran today! yipee! along with an hons and jason to labrador park.. jason runs fast man. couldnt possibly have caught up with him at all.. the park was cool and breezy, really good place to jog. the total distance is less than 2.4 but it felt more tiring than on the track.. for me that is.. maybe i'm just used to the Sunday jogs with Shamu :) jogging this sunday with her as usual.. love you lots mu! celebrate our.. almost 18 years of friendship! haha.. well, we were neighbours since we were born, and we've been together since! (not that kind of together la!!) oh.. i just realised we haven't taken any recent photos of 2 of us.. eeks. we should have an ij gathering sometime after A's and take tons of photos!!! and makan!!! haha.. i'm always thinking about food.. hm.. Fish and Co! (i like the service at Novena Square's man) or Swensons! er, just not sakae sushi.. haha.

oh speaking of Fish and Co, i had a family dinner there recently, and i have to admit i'm a suaku cos it was our first time there.. -_- the food was so good! but that's not the point. our food was brought by this indian guy, whose service is good, but we dont know his name. when it came to settling the bill, my dad actually blurted out some tamil name, govindasamy or something!! my god! it was so embarrassing! then he went on rambling all those possible tamil names he could call the guy in order to get his attention. goodness. i wish i could've hidden under the table.. i cant recall the names, but boy, they were hilarious. no offence to our fellow indians, but the thought of my dad calling him all those names only made me wanna roll on the floor.. the joys of eating with my dad.. heh.

ok, it's over 12. Happy Deepavali everyone! especially to all the indian families out there.. hm. public hol is never enjoyable when exams are approaching. darn. oops, my bro's waiting for the com.. gotta gooooooooo....

with pretty cher!


with de.ass... haha


with my eldest daughter! germie so cute!


with jason!


with jervie my grandson!


with mimi!!


mr wee!! my bro says he looks cute.. haha.


we look super enthu dont we? my dearest sharn sharn!


with shell! now where's rrrrrrritchie..haha


with sze wenn! pretty girl man..


whee! with my youngest daughter zai!!


alrite.. my dar with karen! yans this is for u!

my dar!


Our Couple Of The Year


my girlfriend! (also angie's wife..haha)


my wife.. at the door?!


honz and bunz.. heh

ahem.. as much as i dont wanna put this up.. i have to.. just look at the pic with me covered k?


we're the background for THE couple..


er.. we were just bo liao? but i llllllllike itttttt... haha

i gtg for choir.. but the farewell assembly pics will be up soon! :)

haha.. took photos of my bro the night before farewell assembly.. cute yea? he's 15 already..
well.. at the beginning of this year, my relationship with my bro wasnt that good.. we were often squabbling.. but now, i'm glad the 2 of us are on good terms! oh, brotherly and sisterly love is wonderful.. heh.

wheeeeee! i missed blogging so much..
fyi, i'm supposed to be in church for pract now, but i decided i'll skip it and go for mass only.. :P
btw! had a great time with jem and greg yesterday at Sakae sushi (Toa Payoh)!! so stuffed after the buffet.. felt like throwing up all the food but nah.. i'm not bulimic. guess i gotta run like 2.4km x2?! it feels worse than a beer belly.. >_<

to walk off calories, i decided to head down to orchard.. was supposed to buy Jobeth's birthday present anyway (her birthday's tomorrow).. so yup. outcome of the walk: shopped for jobeth's prezzie AND for myself.. haha. it's so me ya! :P bought this pair of really cool and cute shoes which, excuse me, happens to be the last pair. lol. 1. it means it's damn hot-selling so i made the right choice. 2. it means that half the island will be spotted with those shoes and i wouldnt wanna be wearing them on the same day as someone(s) else! darn, but heck. i love it! oh darn again, that means i cant shop anymore on Sunday.. ugh. never mind, i'll just contend with window-shopping!

is it the after-effects of sushi-eating that makes me feel hungry? haii.. i knew it was a mistake to go for the buffet, but shouldnt one indulge once in a little while? i should be glad for my anti-snacks kitchen cupboards shouldnt i?

talking about food, Sharn Sharn is coming to my house next tuesday for lunch!! *super excited* the menu is already out, but i'm not telling, cos my sista only knows i'm cooking pasta.. heh. dear sista, dont worry, the food is definitely edible and it's gonna taste great k? just remember to bring yourself with an empty stomach.. hee.

oh man.. i tell you.. my dad is L.A.M.E. he just showed me a picture of a pig with only 2 legs, which is in fact the picture of a whole pig folded where the legs are.. looks real actually, but.. LAME!

so.. should i say, like father like daughter?? haha. not really, i think i'm worse. my idol is probably angie's mom! right angie? or is it your dad? O_o? follow in the example of lame-ness..

oh no.. i forgot to put up farewell assembly photos.. hm, that reminds me. averted a disaster that day by scooting off.. that day was real hilarious.. besides angie and i having to take photos with sammy (btw i insist that i'm a third and innocent party, angie and sammy are happily married), there were happy (or rather forced) photos of sharn and peter! and my dar yans and her beloved Mr Potato.. in bliss man those 2.. they are absolutely compatible! oh yea, i thought mr G was quite happy with his G-strings.. lol. will never forget that day.

before i forget, cher, i finally read the blog, but not quite like what you described. haha. relatively interesting, and quite surprised by some stuff.. but that's about it.. time to start a new life, one of new hopes and dreams.

*cough* i'm not supposed to be here, but i couldnt resist the temptation..
i'm having a real bad sore throat now, but it was worse yesterday.. i couldnt even speak without hurting my throat.. dear sharn, it's not your fault.. i guess it's just that my antibodies were not working well.. heh. i guess everyone's studying so hard we've neglected our health..

i feel like an idiot though, after i've decided i'm going for choir pract regardless of A's being round the corner, i get sick. grrrreat.

btw, is it really necessary to let him know how i feel about him since it is the end of school? actually i'd rather he mistake someone else for me.. i dunno what i'm afraid of, just that right now, i dont want him to know. then again, do i have a choice? he already knows. ahh, the complexity of my situation. call me a coward, or avoiding the situation or whatever, but i'm gonna run away.

btw, js, if u stop bugging us non-stop to go k-box, we might go k? seriously, the more i hear about it, the less keen i am to go. fullstop.

i wont forget what mr wee said: i'm not giving up on you, so dont you give up on yourself. despite feeling quite unsure, i'm going to perservere. so i'm going off now.. ha. to make sure i get my econs right.

btw, i guess i wouldnt be blogging for quite a while.. it's not like i used to blog super regularly anyway, but that i'd be blogging even less? oh, the joy of blogging and reading blogs would be gone for now. somebody pls kick me if i start blogging crazily everyday.

talking about kicking myself, i really want to, for going back to choir.. i dont mean to say anything bad about choir at all.. it's just that i took a break at a wrong time and this only proves that i'm really not thinking right. now that A's is in less than a month, i might have to take a break again, which i totally feel bad about. i like going for practice, but it really takes up a lot of mental strength. 4 to 7 in church, singing.. and singing.. and night practice has begun as well.. so by the time i get home i just feel like plopping down onto the bed, so much time is wasted recharging. charlene (choir) was asking me when my A's was.. and i felt damn bad telling her i might disappear again in a few more weeks.. i'm back in choir for only 2 weeks and i'm leaving again soon?! esp when they've begun practice for cantata.. then again, i'll be in rome by mid dec.. but still! i'm at a loss.. i mean, i could always just only go for mass..

ok, angel and devil are exchanging fists within my head.. i'm singing for God, so i should go for mass! at least singing for mass will keep me close to God, besides the prayers. hope mona wouldnt mind me not going for practice.. ack.

lastly, i wanna thank an hons and sharn my dearest sista for all the encouragement that u 2 gave.. love u 2 lots! *hugz* i will hold on.. hopefully effectively.

oops.. i didnt realise the photos couldnt upload.. hm, funny that i could see them on my IE..

well anyway! today's Germie's birthday! Happy 18th Birthday gurl!

ok, back to some past stuff.. i think many might be wondering why i was unusually calm about him getting my no. Well, i couldnt have hung myself or go screaming around the school would I? honestly, i cant do anything and i most prolly wont.. but i'd appreciate it if my friends would kindly stop slapping my back and screaming my name in his presence..thankyou. even if what hui says is true, i dont think any response will come from me.. i dunno. you'd know when an infatuation is over, it's over. that's it. maybe i'd still find the person appealing, but nope, it's over. time to focus on more important things at hand.

seriously, am i someone who's incapable of passing gp? i have no idea, and i honestly-serious-to-the-core cant explain what a mess i'm in. was it the fact that i was thinking about pursuing a course in polytechnic in the midst of mugging?.. that made me feel i wasnt fit to be in a jc or rather reconsidering my academic plans? my grades are a mess, my brain's in a mess, so what's new?

peer pressure can be damn pressurizing. a complex feeling that i cant express in just a sentence? i dont wanna ramble here.. and i dont have the time? all i can say is that things arent going smoothly and i haven been praying hard enough. secondary and junior college.. it's a different thingy altogether.. i lack the enthusiasm, the liveliness, the perserverance and hopefulness i used to have.

i wish for a fairy godmother,
a shining wand;
a gentle tap is all i need,
to set all my problems free.
to put my mind on the right track,
to right my frustration,
and maybe hopelessness?
i may not be eloquent, outstanding,
or out-of-the-ordinary;
just requiring the guide,
a heavenly intervention
before i go insane.

help! the photos are blocked by table2.. i have no idea how to shift it to the right.. i did try aligning right but it's no use.. somebody heeeeeeelp!

These were taken during Discovery Fiesta..



from left: me, shell and mimi!


with char!


and mimi!

Aphrodite/Eros


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

My Inner Age
brought to you by Quizilla

Your a lilly. your elegant and independant, like
the rose you are well respected and admired by
many.


What kind of flower are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

JOHNNY DEPP!!!!!!!!!!!! he's absolutely GORGEOUS!!! even with all that eyeliner.. haha. of cos not forgetting Orlando Bloom.. *drool* i lurrrrrve Pirates Of The Carribean!! till now i'm still confused why Jack Sparrow slit his palm.. don't tell me he's Will's dad?! but then again he's kinda young to be his father.. argh.. i wanna watch it again!!!! i watched it with Jo btw!! and we like so ahhhhhhhhh!! about johnny depp!! sexxxxxy... but totally gaaay when it comes it his walking.. haha.
i would think of it more as a laugh-my-ass-off instead of cool-dude movie though..

dunno y i woke up today feeling so lethargic. totally had no mood to mug at all. just lying around, watching kids central.. stoning.. digging my empty fridge for food (in vain).. complaining to my mom that i have ZERO cents in my wallet cos SOMEBODY "has no money"..
i'm eviiiiiiiiil. ha. come and condemn me to eternal exams-free life pleeeease...

oh yea, i was supposed to meet angie, shell and js at woodlands library.. but i just couldn't get my feet moving.. even if i went i wouldn't be studying properly anyway.. so i told angie i wasn't going.. (very sorry honz)

oh bummer. it's raining.. nice weather to be slacking/sleeping.. eeks. hope i get down to maths soon.. which i'm so gonna stuck at.

ok, for those who read JS's blog already, ya. we went to K-Box on thur... had a really fun time (including laughing at JS).. ok, it's not singing all those old hokkien songs that belong to our parents' era ok? we were singing songs by Tension, SHE blah blah.. cos mimi loves SHE.. heh. and the stupidest (is there such a word?) thing was we saw David Tao, Tao Zhe's name as Tao Zi Zi!!! cos de chinese word was separated.. ARGH. super stupid.. haha. we've decided to go there after prelims! and mimi: we're gonna sing "Tao Zi Zi" songs k? rofl..

and mimi, i think we shall not think too much about the big mistake we made.. we can't salvage the situation ya.. so hopefully things won't turn out too badly.. *cross fingers*

sian. i wanna go watch Pirates of the Carribean! johnny depp's pirate look is so cool! very different from Sleepy Hollows, where he always faints.. haha. and then there's Sinbad.. and i still havent watched LXG.. double sian.

i think it made no difference whether my grandma left or not.. i'm still not concentrating.. so my room is still unoccupied. kinda scary when i think about it. it's like the room's waiting for my grandma to come back.. eeeeeee... i have no idea why i havent moved back to my room.. i study there, but other than that my room's rather unused.. :(

ok, i'm going to my aunt's house to visit my maternal grandma.. i'm always more enthusiastic about visiting my maternal relatives.. i dont give two hoots about my paternal ones.. anw, back to my maternal grandma: she fell after stepping out of the toilet recently, and was diagnosed with a slight stroke.. i've always felt that she's very strong. at 87 she's still walking without help, cooks and does the laundry. impressive eh? most folks at this age might not have survived the fall with just a slight stroke.. and plus it's not the 1st time she fell.. super woman! *salutes*

off i go....

my grandma left for my seventh uncle's house today.
i wonder whether i should cry for joy or for sorrow..
1. i can have my room back to myself ie. i can mug in peace.
2. no one's gonna wake me up for school.. or cook me breakfast..
somehow the alarm clock doesn't have anymore effect on me, so i better set my backup alarms: watch, hp.. AND my mom.. hee. i have a tendency to turn off the alarm and go back to sleep, which is disastrous for geog paper tomorrow! ack.

this week, the moment i hear RnB and hip-hop songs, my legs start itching. sob. i'm deprived of CLUBBING. i desperately need to go clubbing! *calls out to kim* haiiii.. the moment prelims are over, i'm definitely going clubbing. i'm about to burst man! this is so pathetic.. haha.

ah well, back to mugging. :( x100000...